![]() You will probably feel guilty in some way, but you need to let it go.However, it’s important to keep in mind not everyone’s perfect, and it’s OK to have negative memories as well as positive ones. It feels like the easiest way to remember them is in the best possible light. ![]() Why? Well, firstly, because they were your parent who you respected and loved, but also because you can’t bear to criticise them in any way when they aren’t around to defend themselves. One thing I’ve noticed is that you tend to idolise the parent you’ve lost. We take a lot of strength from our parents, so when you lose one of them, it’s crushing. It’s OK to lose your composure, to have an outburst of emotion in public or privately at home or to completely fall apart. Pushing the pain below the surface so no one can see it is exhausting. But just remember you can only put on an act for so long. When my father died, I tried so hard to be strong for my mum and little sister, and show everybody how resilient and tough I was. You don’t have to be strong all the time.Confronting and accepting that the pain is there is scary, but you need to do it to start the grieving process. It’s particularly hard when you lose a parent because initially you just can’t face the prospect of living your life without them, and the only way for some people to cope is to pretend like it’s not really happening. I definitely went through the first month, if not the first year on autopilot, but eventually everything does catch up with you and you start to feel less numb. It may even seem like you are stuck in a dream, and everything that is going on isn’t really happening. Here are ten things nobody tells you about losing a parent. The pain doesn’t go away, you just learn how to accept it, channel it and use it as a way of cherishing the person who was so cruelly taken from you. As soon as you lose a parent it feels like your life has fallen apart and you are caught up in a whirlwind, but you do eventually get your feet back on the ground, I promise. There’s no universal manual to help you deal with the loss of a parent, so when it does happen, a lot of feelings, occurrences and interactions with other people can take you by surprise.įrom my personal experience, I’ve put together some things which I experienced that you might not have thought about or expected to happen. It’s been nearly 11 years since my father died (I was 18 when it happened), so I think I can safely say I’ve been through it all the shock, the sadness, the anger, the guilt, and, eventually, the acceptance. Each stage of your journey will be completely different, and as you wander through your grief, emotions will come and go. I haven’t just felt one emotion since my father passed, my experience has been more like travelling the world. ![]() It’s hard to even put how it feels to lose a parent into words, but the key thing to keep in mind is there is no normal way of reacting. Kiri shares her experience of bereavement after losing a parent, and some things she’s learned along the way. With this in mind, we present this guest post from Kiri Nowak, who blogs over at The Content Wolf. It can often be a source of comfort to hear from someone who has experienced the emotional rollercoaster of losing a loved one and has come out on the other side. Grief will vary from person to person, though there are certain emotions and circumstances that many of us will experience.
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